Reflections on Purpose (Lesson 1 of I Am…So You Don’t Have to Be)

I am in the midst of preparing for Bible Study with a new class on tomorrow.   I posted some time ago about the fits and starts we’ve had with the young adult class.   At least temporarily, our previous class was “closed” and we’ve been moved to work with a younger group of teenagers.    The proposed lesson for tomorrow is on spiritual gifts, but I believe that much teaching has to go forth before talking to anyone about spiritual gifts, so we’re going to start back at who God says these kids are vs. who the world wants them to believe they are.   By no coincidence I’m sure, after checking in with Titus2Woman a few days ago, I was drawn to the online Bible study “I Am…So You Don’t Have to Be”.    The title in and of itself challenged me as one who is constantly “bettering” myself, a hangover from my old days in corporate America, I’m sure.    Also, what a timely ministry to the kids about God and His perfection, not us and our imperfection.   As an aside, I feel that one thing our kids need more of is to understand grace and mercy.  We as adults need to understand grace and mercy.  I felt led to add that in.   Otherwise, we spend time trying to be perfect little children while constantly being corrected and condemned.   In our overzealous nature to teach them holiness, what we really minister is self-righteousness, and the mask that comes with spiritual rules and regulations as opposed to relationship.

This first week’s lesson online was about understanding that our life, our time on this planet, was not by accident, but to know that we are appointed for a work that God has just for us.   The scriptural foundation for the study is the life of Moses, who was born as the Lord announced His plan for Israel’s deliverance, but endured tumultuous circumstances on the road to his purpose. Today’s lesson is that, like Moses, the events and circumstances that surround our birth and our lives to date are all a part of the Lord’s preparation for us to minister, to be a light for Him in the darkness.

I am supposed to answer the questions below:

Are there any circumstances or relationships in your life where you can see God has intentionally placed you to be a light for Him?

Can you honestly describe yourself as a woman with a ‘yes’ in her spirit?

Are you in an emotionally and spiritually healthy place today? If so, what will you do with your series of unrecurring events? Will you commit to ask for spiritual eyes to see opportunities to defend a weaker sister?

If no, are you taking steps to seek out wise counsel from a sister you admire or perhaps a Christian counselor if needed? If not, will you resolve to do so?

At the risk of being rebellious, I also assume that my learning is my learning, so that it would be okay to simply share what the Lord has given me, and I hope you’ll be blessed my testimony.

There was a time when my life when I wondered about timing, purpose, and in general, what my life was supposed to be, spiritually speaking.   You see, my mother was 44 years old when she had me.   She had 4 girls already, and the space between my next oldest sister and me is almost 10 years; suffice it to say that I’m sure she had no plans for a 5^th child.   She survived a miserable first marriage, and wasn’t married to my father when she found out about the pregnancy, although they married soon after I was born.   Moreover, my father was largely estranged from the children of his first marriage, and he desperately wanted a boy.   In fact, when I was small, he would call me “boy”, which might have been short for tomboy.   I never felt unloved nor was I treated poorly, but there are some other extenuating circumstances which I’ll leave unwritten.

I have, at this point in my life, embraced these truths as what they are: the natural circumstances under which I was born, having nothing to do with where I’m going, and less to do with who I am.   I have birthed three “planned for” children, and may birth more of my heart, not of my womb, someday; the means by which they arrive here is not a predestined statement of their God-led destiny, either.

Back to the questions, then. Are there areas in my life where I see God placing me to be a light?   Absolutely.   For much of my adult life, I’ve worked in personal and professional development; for all of my adult life, I’ve worked in children’s ministry.   I have every confidence that all of this is coming together in even more meaningful ways than it has already.   I know the words that have been spoken over my life, and I see the confirmation in the natural.   So I stay sensitive to the needs of my sisters, but I honestly think my real ministry will be to the needs of my younger sisters and brothers, now perhaps physical, if not spiritual, babes in Christ.  

I feel so bad for people whose peak of life is to work, pay bills, get married, and die; walking in God’s plan is such an awesome place to be.   The beauty of this walk is that it’s always changing.   Who I was and what I was five years ago is completely different, though not necessarily bad, than who I am today.   And guess what?   Five years from now I may be in a totally different station of life, and that still may not be my final destination, but they are all important steps on the journey, each worthy of stopping and taking a look around at God’s goodness, grace, and mercy, for none of where I am is because of what I deserved.   I have a ‘yes’ in my spirit to do what He wants, even if it’s a feeble “yes” that is tempered with un-Godly fear and anxiety (I love Joyce Meyer’s saying, “Do it afraid!”)   I’ll continue to occupy until He comes, doing what I think is my purpose for this season, praying for others as I go, and loving the fact that I have divine purpose.   I pray that this will minister to you, particularly to the other “accidents” who read the blog.   God bless.